Welcome

My name is Michael Wilson, and I provide marriage counseling in Tigard, Oregon.   My passion is helping couples achieve a more fulfilling and exciting relationship.

You have probably tried everything you can think of to find peace and contentment.  You may even have tried marriage counseling before, but still you feel caught in a storm of negativity and pain.  I named my practice Still Haven because I want to convey that this is a place of safety and tranquility.  A place where my passion – helping – meets your ache to be helped.

It is never too late to begin healing a marriage in distress.

It’s not easy, but I follow an effective method of marriage counseling called Emotionally-Focused Couples Therapy.  About 85% of the time couples experience a significant increase in marital satisfaction.  Three years after termination of therapy, these couples are still going strong.  If you’re curious, you can learn more about EFT by clicking here.

So please, take your time and look around my website.  You’re looking for the right therapist for you, not just someone who could probably help you.  Successful marriage counseling requires a quality relationship with a therapist you trust.   I encourage you to give me a call.  I’d love to speak with you directly so we can start your journey to a healthier, more fulfilling relationship today.

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A short note regarding individual vs. couples therapy

I would like to take a moment to address a common misconception I hear about therapy, specifically couples therapy.  Often people have the idea they should do individual work to “fix themselves” before starting couples therapy.  I understand why this is an attractive idea, but am increasingly convinced it is unnecessary.

Over the years, we therapists’ have contributed to the idea that a healthy individual is an independent individual.  People should be able to self-regulate, independent of another individual.  Unfortunately, research demonstrates this is incorrect.  Attachment theory teaches us that we are supposed to be dependent on one another.  A healthy dependence on another is not only healthy, it’s necessary.  Effective emotion management requires co-regulation.

Individual therapy has many benefits, which is why I offer therapy for individuals suffering from depression and trauma.  But my experience, and the research, has convinced me the root of our problems, and thus the solution, lies in relationships.  We need healthy attachments with people who are available and responsive to manage our emotions well.

Therefore, for people currently in a committed relationship, working with the couple is typically the most effective way to treat any concern.  This is not to suggest that, if you truly feel you need individual work, I will turn you away.  At the end of the day, you are the expert on you, and I will defer to what you believe to be the best course of action for you.  But I became a marriage therapist for a reason, and it’s because I’ve found the most effective way to alleviate distress is within the couple relationship.

Marriage and Couples

It probably feels like – no matter what you try – you and your partner seem to drift further apart.  You are so different, and sometimes it seems impossible that anyone could help you find one another again.  You may even feel like you can hardly talk anymore because it always seems to end in an argument. The good news is, I consistently help couples just like you rediscover what it means to have a vibrant and fulfilling relationship.  The question is, how?

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Individual Trauma Treatment

If you have experienced trauma, it can sometimes feel like there is no hope for healing.  You probably feel disconnected and distant from others.  It can often feel as though repairing what was broken is an impossible task.  Thankfully, there is hope.

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